Oh my gosh I am going to murder this poem and everything it loves. It is giving me such issues. For one, it really actively irritates me that all my poetry these days are these dumb diary subjects. Even though on some level I realize that it's stupid to be mad that all you can write about is your life, geez, who does that, right. But I can't come up with anything eelllllsssse. And where did my ability to do images go. Why do I always feel like I'm telling and not showing. Guh.
But also I feel like this poem somehow missed the point thematically. Like the last section comes off as a big "hang you, Imma be happy and see how you like THAT" or a "well I'm giving up and faking happy" or something which is ugh not how it's supposed to sound at all. It's supposed to be more like "I wish they could see me now just to know that everything is finally all right, I'm happy and that's good." I don't know what to do or how to change it. I thought of adding an "all my love" to the end of the 'postcard' sentiment, but that seems like a much weaker ending than what I've got. Thinking of changing the "mostly" to "finally"?
And of course I always hate my titles.
SOMEBODY HELP ME DISSECT THIS SUCKER AND MAKE IT WORK. I AM BEGGING.